第十章：婚姻

Chapter 10: Marriage

Marriage: All True Marriage Provides for Something Beyond Itself
婚姻：所有真实的婚姻都是为超越它自身的生命提供的

As revealed to God’s Messenger Marshall Vian Summers on January 1, 1989 in Albany, NY
1989年1月1日，在纽约州奥尔巴尼(Albany, NY)，向上帝的信使马歇尔・维安・萨默斯(Marshall Vian Summers)揭示

Sooner or later you must marry something in life. It may be a person, or it may be a group of people who are serving a great cause in the world. It may be a career. It may be something else, but it has to involve other people. You must marry someone. Marriage to an idea is not meaningful.

在生命中，你迟早要和一些关系结婚。它可能是一个人，也可能是一群人，他们为世界上的一项伟大事业服务。它可能是一项事业。它可能是其他事情，但它必须涉及其他人。你必须与某人结婚。与一个想法结婚是没有意义的。

Marriage, in the truest sense, is where you experience a Greater Reality in a relationship. True marriage is not merely going to the church and taking vows. True marriage is a bonding, a surrender, a commitment. It is the bonding of your mind and body, those things which have been the pinnacle of your separate identity, to another. True marriage is a surrender of a separate life to a certain degree, and it is a commitment to spiritual growth. This is the very essence of marriage. You do not give yourself up here. Instead, you gain a greater self. Here you have not only one mind to help you, you have two minds. You not only have one body, you have two bodies. If your marriage is to a group of people, you have more minds and more bodies. Here your resource for wisdom grows. This can overshadow any sense of personal limitation.

婚姻，在最真实的意义上，是你在一个关系中经历到一个更大的现实。真实的婚姻不仅仅是去教堂和宣誓。真实的婚姻是一种结合，一种屈服，一种承诺。它是将你的身心，那些一直是你独立身份的顶峰的内识，与另一个人结合在一起。真实的婚姻在某种程度上是对独立生命的交出，是对精神上成长的承诺。这就是婚姻的实质。你在这里并没有放弃自己。相反，你获得了一个更大的自我。在这里，你不仅有一个心灵来帮助你，你有两个心灵。你不仅有一个身体，你还有两个身体。如果你的婚姻是与一群人的婚姻，你有更多的心灵和更多的身体。在这里，你的智慧资源会增长。这可以盖过任何个人限制的感觉。

Until you truly marry someone, until you give yourself that completely, you are still bound to your imagination, and you are still overshadowed by your ideas. Imagination without Knowledge is chaotic and casts confusion and darkness over your mind. Yet imagination with Knowledge is a source of joyful creation and expression. Whether you spend your life in celibacy or whether you are a family person, you must become deeply connected to other people.

在你真正与人结婚之前，在你完全给自己这个机会之前，你仍然被你的想象力所束缚，你仍然被你的想法所掩盖。没有内识的想象力是混乱的，在你的心灵中投下混乱和黑暗。然而，有内识的想象力是快乐的创造和表达的源泉。无论你是在独身主义中度过一生，还是在家庭中度过一生，你都必须与其他人建立深厚的联系。

True marriage becomes absolutely necessary in the third stage of development. Anything short of marriage here ceases to have value. This is because nothing short of this deeper commitment in marriage can carry a greater vision and higher purpose into the world. If you are to be a family person, you marry your partner, and you are bonded to your offspring. You commit yourself to their well-being, and you provide for them. As you do so, you will see that you are not apart from them. Though you are still an individual and though you still have your sanctuary within yourself, your life is intertwined with others. This changes your fate and your destiny and provides a reward which you could not have otherwise.

真实的婚姻在发展的第三阶段变得绝对必要。在这里，任何缺乏婚姻的关系都不再有价值。这是因为在婚姻中没有什么比这种更深的承诺更能够将更大的愿景和更高宗旨带入世界。如果你要成为一个家庭的人，你就和你的伴侣结婚，你就和你的后代结合在一起。你对他们的福祉作出承诺，并为他们提供服务。当你这样做时，你会看到你并不与他们分开。尽管你仍然是一个个体，尽管你仍然有你自己的避难所，但你的生命与他人交织在一起。这改变了你的天命和前途，并提供了你无法得到的回报。

There are many marriages being made and broken every day in the world. There are contracts and agreements. There are attempts at devotion and dedication. Yet unless Knowledge is your foundation, unless you have arrived at that point where true marriage is a necessity and not merely an option, unless you have been prepared for being in a relationship at this level, your marriage will only be an attempt. This is true even if you value marriage for the right reasons. This is why you must be prepared.

世界上每天都有许多婚姻在缔结和破裂。有合同和协议。也有尝试献身和奉献的人。然而，除非内识是你的基础，除非你已经达到了真实的婚姻是必要的而不仅仅是一种选择的地步，除非你已经为在这种层面的关系中做好准备，否则你的婚姻将只是一种尝试。即使你出于正确的原因重视婚姻，也是如此。这就是为什么你必须做好准备。

To a certain extent, in true marriage, you give yourself up. Yet here you are actually only giving up an illusion about yourself. Here, to a certain degree, you are divorcing your marriage to your self-limiting ideas and re-establishing marriage within the context of your relationship with another. In essence, you are always married to something because you are always committed to something. It is not true to say you are not committed. That is false. Everyone in the world is committed to something, everyone in the world is serving something and everyone in the world is teaching something because you must be committed, you must serve and you must teach. This is a natural function of being in the world. It is inescapable. Here the emphasis is on the quality, direction and meaning of your engagement because you will be engaged either way.

在某种程度上，在真实的婚姻中，你放弃了你自己。然而在这里，你实际上只是放弃了对你自己的幻想。在这里，在某种程度上，你正在将你的婚姻与你的自我限制的想法离婚，并在你与另一个人的关系范围内重新建立婚姻。从本质上讲，你总是与某些关系结婚，因为你总是致力于某些关系。说你没有承诺是不对的。那是错误的。世界上的每个人都致力于某些关系，世界上的每个人都在服务某些关系，世界上的每个人都在教导某些事情，因为你必须投入，你必须服务，你必须教导。这是在这个世界上的一个自然功能。它是不可避免的。这里强调的是你订婚的质量、方向和意义，因为你将以任何方式订婚。

In true marriage, you give yourself up to a certain degree. What you gain back is a greater self. Here you don’t escape all the problems of separation. You take on a new set of problems. For instance, if you are a single person and you get married to someone, you give up a certain set of problems for another set of problems. You have some of the same problems but in a larger context. You must still earn a livelihood, but now you have to earn a livelihood for more than yourself. You have to share that with your partner and provide for your offspring. Providership is very important because the essence of marriage is providership, not self-gratification. Yet true providership is incredibly gratifying. In fact, this is the most gratifying thing of all, for it produces lasting satisfaction and contribution.

在真实的婚姻中，你在某种程度上放弃了你自己。你所获得的是一个更大的自我。在这里，你并没有逃避所有分离的问题。你承担了一系列新的问题。例如，如果你是一个单身的人，你和某人结婚，你放弃了某一套问题，换来了另一套问题。你有一些相同的问题，但在一个更大的范围内。你仍然必须谋生，但现在你必须为更多的人谋生。你必须与你的伴侣分享这些，并为你的后代提供食物。供养是非常重要的，因为婚姻的实质是供养，而不是自我满足。然而，真实的供养是令人难以置信的满足。事实上，这是最令人满意的事情，因为它产生持久的满足和贡献。

Two people who enter into a true marriage must either provide for their offspring or provide for something else in the world because all true marriage provides for something beyond itself. This is what distinguishes true marriage from a temporary alignment between two people who are attempting to escape their loneliness and to use one another for personal fulfillment.

进入真实婚姻的两个人必须要么供养他们的后代，要么供养世界上的其他生命，因为所有真实的婚姻都供养超越它自身的生命。这就是真实的婚姻与两个人之间暂时的结合的区别，这两个人试图摆脱他们的孤独，利用对方来实现个人的满足。

If you look out in the world, you will find that true marriage seems to be rare. That is because there are not many people in the third stage of development. Marriage in the first stage of development is different from marriage in the second stage, and marriage in the third stage of development is entirely different from marriage in the first two stages.

如果你放眼世界，你会发现真实的婚姻似乎很罕见。这是因为处于第三发展阶段的人不多。发展的第一阶段的婚姻与第二阶段的婚姻不同，发展的第三阶段的婚姻与前两个阶段的婚姻完全不同。

Very few marriages can go from stage one to stage two and even fewer marriages can go from stage two to three. It is, therefore, common that people divorce if one of them is moving into the next stage. Here the person realizes that they must move forward and discovers that their partner cannot or will not go with them. And regardless of the agreements and cooperation that may exist between them, this is the truth of the matter. Marriages often fail here because they cannot keep pace with the natural evolution of the people involved.

很少有婚姻能从第一阶段进入第二阶段，更少有婚姻能从第二阶段进入第三阶段。因此，如果其中一方进入下一个阶段，人们离婚是很常见的。在这里，这个人意识到他们必须向前迈进，并发现他们的伴侣不能或不愿意与他们一起走。而不管他们之间可能存在的协议和合作，这就是事情的真相。婚姻往往在这里失败，因为它们无法跟上参与其中的人的自然进化的步伐。

True marriage must provide for others because what will be generated between two people will far exceed their own personal needs. They will become a source of genuine community for people around them. This is a result of true marriage. Whereas before, in the first two stages, individuals may have tried to give to others and succeeded to a certain extent, in the third stage the value and the essence of the marriage become a genuine source of nourishment for others.

真实的婚姻必须为他人提供，因为两个人之间将产生的关系将远远超过他们自己的个人需求。他们将成为他们周围人的真正社区的来源。这是真实婚姻的结果。之前，在前两个阶段，个人可能试图给他人，并在一定程度上取得了成功，而在第三个阶段，婚姻的价值和本质成为滋养他人的真正来源。

Life for people, animals, plants and all other living things is all about providership. Nature is all about providership. It does not glorify the individual. It expresses itself through the individual. In this way, the individual becomes great and necessary without being given precedent or priority over others. This is borne out in nature. If you observe life around you, you realize that human beings have a great deal to learn from nature in order to become more natural themselves. There is a great deal of unlearning that must be accomplished here, and it can be accomplished because Knowledge is with you.

人、动物、植物和所有其他生物的生命都是关于供养的。自然界都是关于供养的。它不颂扬个体性。它通过个体性表达它自身。这样一来，个体性就变得伟大而必要，而不会被赋予优先于他人的地位或优先权。这在自然界中得到了证实。如果你观察你周围的生命，你就会意识到，人类有很多关系需要从自然界学习，以使自己变得更加自然。这里必须完成大量的解除学习，而且可以完成，因为内识与你同在。

Within the three stages of development, there are three stages in marriage as well. Each one has a different emphasis. Generally speaking, marriage in stage one is about personal security. Marriage in stage two is about personal exploration. And marriage in stage three is about personal contribution. Though problems arise and learning continues through each of these stages, these are the primary emphases.

在发展的三个阶段中，婚姻中也有三个阶段。每一个阶段都有不同的重点。一般来说，第一阶段的婚姻是关于个人安全。第二阶段的婚姻是关于个人探索。而第三阶段的婚姻是关于个人贡献。尽管在每个阶段都会出现问题并继续学习，但这些是主要的重点。

In each of the three stages of development, there is a process of surrender in marriage. In each stage, you acquire something and you give something up for another. What you acquire and what you give up will determine the kind of marriage you will have and how far it can ultimately go with you.

在这三个发展阶段中的每一个阶段，婚姻中都有一个放弃的过程。在每个阶段，你获得一些东西，你为另一个人放弃一些东西。你获得什么和放弃什么将决定你将拥有什么样的婚姻，以及它最终能与你走多远。

Ultimately, real surrender is allowing your body to serve your mind and your mind to serve your spirit, which is an expression of God. Here surrender re-establishes the proper order of authority within yourself. Yet many people think that surrender is where you give up what you really want for something else or where you give your power away to someone else. This is what many people in the first two stages so often assume. Yet real surrender is about finding who you are, why you are here, what you need to do and what your gifts are. Here things are willingly given up in order to clear the way for this great discovery. The sacrifice here is small and the reward is so great.

归根结底，真正的屈服是让你的身体为你的心灵服务，让你的心灵为你的精神服务，这是上帝的一种表达。在这里，屈服重新建立了你自己内部适当的力量秩序。然而，许多人认为，屈服是你为了别的关系而放弃你真正想要的东西，或者你把你的权力交给别人。这就是许多处于前两个阶段的人经常假设的。然而，真正的屈服是关于找到你是谁，你为什么在这里，你需要做什么，你的礼物是什么。在这里，人们愿意放弃一些关系，以便为这一伟大的发现扫清道路。这里的牺牲很小，回报却很大。

Marriage in the first stage is usually focused on such things as pleasure, emotional security, financial security and, in some cases, social advantage. To acquire these things, people knowingly or unknowingly sacrifice their freedom, their self-honesty, their integrity and their spiritual growth. This is common. The emphasis may be on love, but this is a very limited experience of love, and its primary emphasis is self-gratification or, in other words, getting what you want. After an enticing romantic phase, these relationships can struggle greatly as they come to terms with the demands of living a real life. As people go forward in these relationships, real intimacy and honesty tend to dry up as they attempt to protect their “investment” in their joint property and financial security. Children often become the reason for staying together, which puts the guilt and blame upon them for their parents’ increasingly unhappy relationship.

第一阶段的婚姻通常集中在诸如快乐、情感安全、财务安全等方面，在某些情况下还有社会优势。为了获得这些东西，人们有意或无意地牺牲了他们的自由、他们的自我诚实、他们的诚信和他们精神上的成长。这很常见。重点可能是爱，但这是一种非常有限的爱的经历，其主要重点是自我满足，或换句话说，得到你想要的关系。在一个诱人的浪漫阶段之后，这些关系可能会有很大的挣扎，因为他们要面对现实生活的要求。当人们在这些关系中前进时，真正的亲密关系和诚实往往会枯竭，因为他们试图保护他们对共同财产和财务安全的”投资”。孩子们往往成为留在一起的理由，这使他们对父母越来越不愉快的关系感到内疚和指责。

Sooner or later, one or, in rare cases, both people in the marriage will face the fact that their marriage is unfulfilling and that a reassessment and change must be made. Here Knowledge is beginning to stir in the person, encouraging them to seek a greater union either with their partner or with someone else. The person is now approaching the next stage of their development.

迟早有一天，婚姻中的一个人，或者在极少数情况下，婚姻中的两个人都会面对这样一个事实：他们的婚姻是不满足的，必须进行重新评估和改变。在这里，内识开始在这个人身上涌动，鼓励他们寻求更大的结合，无论是与他们的伴侣还是与其他人。这个人现在正接近其发展的下一个阶段。

Marriage in the second stage of development holds much more promise. Here spiritual growth and personal honesty are given a higher priority, but there is still a great emphasis on emotional safety and financial security. These marriages often reflect the growing struggle between Knowledge and personal fulfillment that one or both of the people involved are experiencing. As a result, the marriage is burdened with the nearly impossible task of balancing two great forces that are struggling for predominance within one or both people in the relationship.

发展第二阶段的婚姻有更大的希望。在这里，精神上的成长和个人诚实被置于更高的优先位置，但仍然非常强调情感安全和经济保障。这些婚姻往往反映了参与其中的一个或两个人正在经历的内识和个人满足之间日益增长的挣扎。因此，这段婚姻背负着几乎不可能完成的任务，即平衡两股巨大的力量，这两股力量在关系中的一方或双方内部争夺主导地位。

In stage two, neither person has yet discovered what their life is really about nor has a clear sense of where they are going. And often, they find out sooner or later that they are not going in the same direction as their partner. Here the emphasis on emotional safety and financial security becomes threatened and has to compete with the great uncertainty that their inner exploration can generate. Here people can surrender their health, their financial stability and sometimes even their sanity as they try and make sense out of the divergence between the direction of their individual life and their commitment in marriage. And sadly, many people end up sacrificing their own discovery of Knowledge as they try and keep their marriage and its benefits intact.

在第二阶段，两个人都还没有发现他们的生命真正是什么，也没有清楚地意识到他们要去哪里。而且，他们往往迟早会发现，他们的方向与伴侣的方向不一致。在这里，对情感安全和经济保障的强调变得有威胁，不得不与他们内心的探索可能产生的巨大不确定性竞争。在这里，人们可能会放弃他们的健康，他们的经济稳定，有时甚至是他们的理智，因为他们试图从他们个人生活的方向和他们在婚姻中的承诺之间的分歧中获得意义。可悲的是，许多人最终牺牲了自己对内识的发现，因为他们试图保持他们的婚姻及其利益的完整。

Marriage in the first stage has very little foundation and is generally threatened by the emergence of the truth and real honesty, which together usually reveal all that is genuinely lacking in the relationship. Marriage in the second stage often will reflect higher personal standards and goals but is nearly always beset by the fact that the people involved have not yet built their foundation upon Knowledge within themselves. As a result, they end up trying to satisfy both their personal desires and the deeper need of their soul at great cost to their well-being and personal stability. They may experience real love together, but real love here may force them to separate for reasons that they cannot at this point understand.

第一阶段的婚姻没有什么基础，一般会受到真相和真正的诚实出现的威胁，这两者加在一起通常会揭示关系中真正缺乏的一切。第二阶段的婚姻往往会反映出更高的个人标准和目标，但几乎总是被这样一个事实所困扰，即相关人员还没有在自己内心的内识基础上建立起自己的基础。结果，他们最终试图同时满足个人欲望和灵魂深处的需求，但却付出了巨大的代价，影响了他们的幸福和个人稳定。他们可能会在一起经历真正的爱，但这里真正的爱可能会迫使他们因此时无法理解的原因而分离。

In essence, stage one is about dependence. Stage two is about independence. And stage three is about interdependence—dependence, independence and interdependence. Marriage in stage one is about building security and reinforcing dependence. This fundamentally opposes personal honesty and the emergence of Knowledge. Marriage in stage two is more about people discovering and differentiating themselves by learning to think and act independently. This produces personal growth but makes the prospect of attaining real union and commitment in relationship very difficult to establish.

在本质上，第一阶段是关于依赖性。第二阶段是关于独立。而第三阶段是关于相互依存——依赖、独立和相互依存。第一阶段的婚姻是关于建立安全感和加强依赖性的。这从根本上反对个人的诚实和内识的出现。第二阶段的婚姻更多是关于人们通过学习独立思考和行动来发现和区分自己。这产生了个人的成长，但使得在关系中实现真正的结合和承诺的前景非常难以建立。

Attempting marriage in the first two stages is very difficult. In either case, you must put the marriage at risk in order to find and follow Knowledge within yourself. If this cannot be done, you will end up abandoning your Knowledge altogether and with it any hope of finding real happiness and satisfaction in your life.

在前两个阶段尝试婚姻是非常困难的。在任何一种情况下，你都必须把婚姻置于危险之中，以便在自己内心找到并遵循内识。如果不能做到这一点，你最终将完全放弃你的内识，并随之放弃在你的生命中找到真正的幸福和满足的任何希望。

Your life is meant to take you somewhere. It is meant to enable you to reach real clarity and maturity within yourself and within your relationships. Here you must surrender your attempt at personal fulfillment in order to be free to find the real fulfillment that is waiting for you. This naturally leads you through the stages of development. Here you pass beyond dependence to become independent, and that is a great process in and of itself. And then eventually you will pass beyond independence to become interdependent. This is when marriage has the greatest potential, for you can only be in true marriage in a state of interdependence.

你的生命是为了把你带到某个地方。它的目的是使你在自己和你的关系中达到真正的清晰度和成熟度。在这里，你必须放弃你对个人满足的尝试，以便自由地找到等待你的真正的满足。这自然会引导你经历发展的各个阶段。在这里，你超越了依赖性而变得独立，这本身就是一个伟大的过程。然后最终你将超越独立，成为相互依存。这时婚姻具有最大的潜力，因为你只有在相互依存的状态下才能进入真实的婚姻。

The third stage is the stage of interdependence. Here you come to realize that no matter how free and independent you have become, you can do nothing alone. Alone your life has little meaning and promise. Alone you are only a potential. To find your gifts, you need real relationships in your life, and they must be built upon Knowledge. Here surrender becomes the natural expression of your desire to give your life to those people and to the higher purpose that are meant for you. Here you do not really surrender yourself. Instead, your Knowledge surrenders you. Here you do not need to struggle over whether you want to give yourself to another. It is simply known.

第三阶段是相互依存的阶段。在这里你会意识到，无论你变得多么自由和独立，你都不能独自做任何事情。独自一人，你的生命没有什么意义和希望。孤独的你只是一种潜力。为了找到你的礼物，你需要在你的生命中建立真正的关系，而这些关系必须建立在内识之上。在这里，屈服成为你的愿望的自然表达，把你的生命交给那些人，交给为你准备的更高宗旨。在这里，你并没有真正交出你自己。相反，你的内识让你屈服了。在这里，你不需要为你是否想把自己交给他人而挣扎。它只是被知道。

What was thought to be important before becomes necessary now. Honesty, integrity, compatibility and service to the world may have been attempted in the first two stages, but now they have become the determining criteria regarding who you can be with and how you are to participate with them. Here the fantasies of love are dispelled in favor of the real power of love, which is connected to your higher purpose in the world. When you give your life to this, real love will emanate from you naturally. Yet neglect this and go against your higher purpose and love will degenerate into frantic desire and fear. Here love’s redeeming grace and power will be lost.

以前认为重要的内识现在变得必要了。诚实、正直、兼容和对世界的服务在前两个阶段可能已经尝试过，但现在它们已经成为关于你能和谁在一起以及你如何参与他们的决定性标准。在这里，爱的幻想被驱除，而支持爱的真正力量，这与你在这个世界上的更高宗旨有关。当你把你的生命交给它时，真正的爱会自然地从你身上散发出来。然而忽视这一点，违背你更高的宗旨，爱就会退化为疯狂的欲望和恐惧。在这里，爱的救赎之恩和力量将被丧失。

True marriage is the reward for passing through the stages of development. What was sought before now becomes truly possible and necessary. You are always preparing for true marriage, for true marriage is your goal. It is true contribution. This can be expressed through a union with one other person or with many people who are serving a great cause in the world. In either case, Knowledge, compatibility and service in the world are what distinguish a true marriage from all other relationships.

真实的婚姻是对通过发展阶段的奖励。以前寻求的婚姻现在变得真正可能和必要。你总是在为真实的婚姻做准备，因为真实的婚姻是你的目标。它是真实的贡献。这可以通过与另一个人的结合或与许多人的结合来表达，这些人都在为世界的伟大事业而服务。在这两种情况下，内识、兼容性和在世界上的服务是真实的婚姻与其他所有关系的区别。

True marriage is where you exchange a small self for a greater self without losing your individuality. True marriage is where your individuality becomes a part of something greater and a vehicle for something greater. Here your individuality is an asset and not a liability. This frees you rather than holds you in bondage. In the earlier stages, you were bound to serve your desires and beliefs. Now you are serving something greater. This is the path of fulfillment.

真实的婚姻是你用一个小我换取一个大我而不失去你的个体性。真实的婚姻是你的个体性成为更伟大关系的一部分，成为更伟大内识的载体。在这里，你的个体性是一种资产，而不是一种负担。这使你得到自由，而不是使你受到束缚。在早期阶段，你被束缚着为你的欲望和信仰服务。现在你在为更伟大的目的服务。这就是实现的道路。

True marriage is waiting for you. Yet you may not know what it will look like. You may not know if it will be with another person or with a group of people who are serving a great cause. You may not know if your marriage to another will be for the purpose of having children or not. Yet true marriage is waiting for you.

真实的婚姻在等着你。然而你可能不知道它将是什么样子。你可能不知道它是否会与另一个人或与一群为伟大事业服务的人在一起。你可能不知道你与另一个人的婚姻是否将是为了孕育孩子。然而，真实的婚姻正在等待着你。

Whenever and wherever true marriage has been established, a great blessing has occurred in the world, a miracle has been demonstrated. Two or more people have transcended their limits. These alliances, as rare as they may be, are truly beneficial and have great foundation. They are what has kept Knowledge alive in the world. They are what keep humanity advancing.

无论何时何地，只要建立了真实的婚姻，世界上就会出现巨大的祝福，就会有奇迹出现。两个或更多的人已经超越了他们的极限。这些联盟，尽管可能是罕见的，但确实是有益的，并且有很大的基础。它们是使内识在这个世界上保持活力的原因。它们是使人类不断进步的原因。

In true marriage, you are able to experience the union you have with your Inner Teachers and Spiritual Family with another person. This union is now being expressed in the world. Once you have experienced your union with your Spiritual Family, you will not want anything less in your marriage with another.

在真实的婚姻中，你能够与另一个人经历你与你的内在老师和精神家庭的结合。这种结合现在在世界中得到了体现。一旦你经历到与你的精神家庭的结合，你就不会在与另一个人的婚姻中想要任何东西了。

Once a true marriage has been established, a commitment to growth must be undertaken and maintained. The desire for this will emanate naturally. Yet you cannot be neglectful and take for granted that the other person will be with you forever. For if you neglect what you must do together, and if you neglect what you must face within yourself, then even a marriage with great promise will wither. This relationship must still be cultivated and nourished. Without nourishment, it will die. It will cease to progress, and without progress, it cannot maintain itself.

一旦建立了真实的婚姻，就必须承担和保持对成长的承诺。这方面的愿望会自然地散发出来。然而，你不能疏忽大意，想当然地认为对方会永远和你在一起。因为如果你忽视了你们必须一起做的事情，如果你忽视了你必须面对自己内心的内识，即使是有很大希望的婚姻也会枯萎。这种关系仍然必须得到培养和滋养。没有滋养，它就会死亡。它将停止进步，而没有进步，它就不能维持它自己。

From a point of view where separation is protected and defended, truth appears to be an undermining threat to a person’s happiness and personal fulfillment. But to Knowledge, the truth is a blessing, a welcome and wonderful guest whom you wish would stay forever, an experience so unlike anything in contrast to it and so totally beneficial and self-affirming that in time you will seek nothing else.

从一个保护和捍卫分离的观点来看，真理似乎是对一个人的幸福和个人满足的破坏性威胁。但对内识来说，真理是一种祝福，是一个受欢迎的、美妙的客人，你希望他能永远留下来，这种经历与任何与之相对的关系都不一样，而且完全有益和自我肯定，到时候你将不再寻求其他关系。

Therefore, accept that true marriage is inevitable for you because you are married to your Spiritual Family and your Inner Teachers already. This marriage must express itself in the world in your relationships with others. Accept that you are committed already to your Spiritual Family and to your Inner Teachers. In the world, you are married and committed to your ideals until you are able to break free to experience marriage and commitment within the context of your real relationships with others.

因此，接受真实的婚姻对你来说是不可避免的，因为你已经嫁给了你的精神家庭和你的内在老师。这种婚姻必须在你与他人的关系中表现出来。接受你已经致力于你的精神家庭和你的内在老师。在这个世界上，你已经嫁给了你的理想，直到你能够挣脱束缚，在你与他人的真实关系中经历婚姻和承诺。